Blah and Blah Some More

'' I don't wanna get married, I only want to adopt kids ''
'' but won't you want to have kids of your own? "
" Well I do, but I can't exactly produce my own sperm and ovum. If I did then I'll be popping babies out all the time ''

LOL, I wonder how confused will people be if they listen to our daily conversation.

Can you believe it's the month of July already? don't you think 2010's moving too fast? Another 5 months then I'll be finish with my first senior year ;( which leaves me with only a year before I finally leave high school for real. Start a whole new life in college.

I've always thought being fifteen is scary. 15 is like this age between 10 and 20. The age where everything has to be taken into consideration with a matured mind.

When I was 10, I was still this little girl who knew nothing better about the world. I didn't really give much damn about what revolved around me. The only thing that mattered the most was how to get good marks at school in order to please my parents and the only thing that could hurt me was whenever I went for my dentist appointments and had to deal with the pain when the drill went inside my mouth. I let everything went with the flow, it was a nice one indeed.

Suddenly, I'm fifteen. I'm finally living the age that has always brought me the creeps. I've been through a lot of things, the ups and downs, those twists and turns, I've felt how it feels to be in a cross road, pulled from every single directions. My life feels like a neverending roller coaster ride. Someone just has to put in coins and some more coins into the machine booth.

What will it be like when I'm 20? Where will I be? What will I be doing? Will I be blogging telling the world how fucked up my life is? or Will you be finding me sketching on my sketch book, wasting my time away in Coffeebean? or watching the sky as the plane passes by leaving me with goosebumps? Will I finally be working on my own? or will I still be stuck somewhere else?

I, honestly, am clueless of what I'm gonna do in the future. Back then it was easy for me to say I wanted to become a doctor. That was waaaaaay back when I was still 6 years old. What does a 6 year old know about being a doctor beside the fact that he wears nice white suit and has a funny looking big earphones hanging around his neck when it's actually a stethescope?

Seems like 'the future' has put a great influence on my life lately. Not just mine, but my friends' as well. Seeing how high school is gonna end in a year time, I feel like I should really start planning my life from now before it's too late. I can never imagine how is it going to be like for me when I finally leave high school, I'm sure it's gonna be really heartbreaking ;(