Blah and Blah Some More

currently listening to The Smiths - Please, Please, Please, Let Me Get What I Want. my second favourite song after There's a Light that Never Goes Out, 'and if there's a double-decker bus crashes into us, to die by your side is such a heavenly way to die' .

sometimes i forget that time has the ability to travel faster than light. high school has officially ended for me and my friends couple of weeks ago. no more calling each other's names in school canteen, pinching each other's asses while walking in the school corridor, making fun of the juniors, shouting randomly at the seniors we have no idea who, skipping subjects after lunch for a trip to the beach, teasing the old chinese security guard who has a pair of lovely sunnies, acting rebelliously for the sake of the principal's attention, attention whores indeed haha.

im not going to be a hypocrite and say that i'm happy and relieved i'm finally done with this shit hole, because the truth is i'm not, surprisingly. if i could rewind back the time and bring the 14 years old me to the present, she would have loved the idea of leaving school more than anything else. isn't it funny? how everything changes in such a short time, and how everything seems a lot, much better in fact, when it's going to leave us? suppose the building that have become a huge part of my daily life for the last 4 years could talk, it would probably be yelling at me right now, ' go get the fuck outta here and chase your dreams, go live your life the way you've always wanted to'

and to be really honest what dreams? what life?

none of those matter when you're in high school. ironically, things like 'whose house are we crashing tonight?' 'what movie is playing in the cinema tonight?' did. right now, i'm feeling lost and confused. everyone else seem to have figured out what they want to do or where they want to go. they have built themselves boats, whereas me, i'm still follwing the current of water, letting life surprise me.